Reflection #4107---

di ka ba nababato sa buhay? parang wala naman talagang nangyayari. nothing to expect much of. nothing to get excited about, really. nakakabato, diba?

i find myself lamenting over the state of things surrounding myself. where people hustle and bustle with the many things they enjoy doing, i on the other hand seem to not get my bearing, my eyes cannot seem to focus on what gives life meaning, what action to take, what things to do, what world to see, what thoughts to happily ponder.

such is an utter state of an unmotivated life. no inspiration. none to partake in which can move my soul.

sad.

i would rather cry but my tears are elusive even to me. earlier i thought, "maybe i will meet someone close enough to be able to tell her to slap me (her lang kasi masakit pag lalake ang sumampal) so i can wake up from this mad state i'm in. and that i will share my tears with her, and finally let her in."

...i so much wish to leave the night, but not enough dawn is there to make me want to.